Creating Partnerships and Trust

When forming a partnership for the interview I felt apprehensive about even asking for a partner. I was afraid that I would be the one at the end waiting for someone to join, or get rejected. It is funny because this was part of the assignment, so someone was going to have to accept. However, I think that in real online experience, it may be more likely to happen. I think that initiating it in the "real" online world may be a bit more difficult because others may be more picky with who they invest their "social capital".

Once Nancy and I had formally made our choice, picking and utilizing one way of communicating was difficult. I already had my own forum, so I tried using that. It was helpful in some ways, but a lot of the central communication was through email. Also, coordinating our schedules and pace of participation was a challenge. I felt like I was slowing down the process because of my other commitments. I hoped that Nancy didn't get frustrated in case she was more of a type A personality.

Once we got going, and Nancy provided as a good model of how to do the questions and answer. I felt like she shared a lot of herself, this allowed me to open up also. I think that there was an equal balance of bonding and openness, while at the same time some closed distance. I felt at times there were some personal boundaries that we didn't cross, details we didn't go into. Like we weren't trying to really put everything all out there like a BFF. However, I wished we had shared pictures, or webcast, or even voice. We can always do that as we work together.

Despite this, I feel like we started the process of bonding and getting to know one another that may be able to extend and grow in the future. A first step. I also appreciated Nancy opening up about her some difficult life challenges, as well as the role religion plays in her life. She took a big risk since you never know how the other person will react. I too took a risk in letting her know that I didn't really have the same beliefs, but wanted to know that I can see the beauty in her relationship with God and that it wasn't going to be a problem for me. I was still afraid that she would feel like she couldn't fully be herself. However, I still know that if we did have the same beliefs our bond may actually be a bit stronger, since there is such a strong bond within a religious community by its very nature.

I felt like after getting to know her more, writing the piece to share was easier than I thought. It was interesting how when I created a narrative through writing, it all came together and I was weirdly able to connect more. I think that it is interesting how there is a disconnect between what I would have written about myself, and what she wrote about me. I realized that the information that I provided to her was just a small tid-bit and maybe I wasn't effective in sharing who I am. But it was also interesting to see how she viewed me. I then understood what she saw, heard, and understood.